Untitled I

How many memories did you have to kill to survive? How many times did you forget just so you wouldn’t go crazy? How many times did you swallow the people you used to love, Felt them drag down your throat like razor blades How many of them became razor blades- Unzipped you to show all the ugly inside All the hurt, All the anger, All the resentment that you built up Clogging your pores Filling all the empty spaces inside you How many times did they start a fire and you were left holding the matches? How many flames have you had to walk into? The smoke making it hard to breathe and you cough up all the memories you own As you look for the remains of your past amongst all the ashes Smoke signals you chose to ignore Fire alarms and you didn’t hear a single one How many happy memories turned into ice? Turned into fire? Froze you on the inside just to burn everything around you

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you walked out of this and found a better life with all the things that used to be mine i dragged myself out of this and found myself without a home i swear to god you were the worst thing that ever happened to me and i hate you for making me hate you i thought you were a sunset i thought you were a place to rest i thought you were a bright light, a warm hand to hold i didnt think i would have to survive you i didnt think i would survive you